Twenty years ago today, I would have signed a note for one million dollars to have this picture. You see, twenty years ago today, the young man in this picture sitting next to the girl he loves, was born via emergency C-section, weighing only one pound, fifteen and one-half ounces, and measuring barely 13 inches long. His daddy's wedding band went up his arm, all the way to his shoulder. He didn't have a smidgen of fat anywhere on his little skinned-rat looking body, but he was a bright pink color with the same jawline and blonde peach fuzz that his older sister had. After scrubbing in and gowning up, we could stand beside his warmer, watching the machines monitor his vital signs, but we couldn't touch him, and I couldn't speak because he'd stop breathing in an effort to listen to my voice.
Drew really was our "Million Dollar Baby," and I was terrified. Terrified of losing him, terrified of all the things that could go wrong, terrified of how to take care of such a fragile little person, terrified of what the future might hold for us all. I have no doubt I would have bargained with the devil for a 5-minute glimpse into the future just to know what was ahead. And what a waste that would have been! The scared girl who had just lost a lot of blood delivering the tiniest baby in the NICU didn't have much faith in the benevolent source of Love and Strength in the Universe that I have come to know and trust and lovingly call the God of my understanding. So the glimpse I wanted so desperately that day wouldn't have satisfied me; the fear that gripped me was the strongest force in my life then, and it was insatiable.
How grateful I am to be a different person, in a different place, twenty years down the road! And how grateful I am for this tiny son who has grown to be an honorable man, and who has in so many ways been an instrument of bringing me to the faith and serenity I enjoy today.
Yes, there are some days when I could wring his hairy little neck!
And yes, he can sweet-talk me with that mega-watt smile the way no one else can.
Such is a mother's plight. Still, I like to think that our auspicious beginning on 1/18/1991 kept me grounded, giving me perspective during the rough patches and appreciation for the little joys along the way.
Happy, Happy Birthday, my Drew-Boy! May your life continue to be one grand miracle after another, may you keep that tenacious spirit, that joie de vivre, that quick wit and easy laugh, and may you be granted many years filled with much love to touch the lives of others the way you have touched mine.
Love,
Momma
No comments:
Post a Comment